“Suppose one of you has a friend and goes to him in the middle of the night…”

It is often understood in close friendships and relationships that people are there for one another.

 Some of our friends have made the statement “you can call on me anytime, day or night”. There are times when a crisis occurs unannounced in our lives and we know exactly who we can turn to, confident that we will receive assistance even though we may seek it “in the middle of the night.”

The gospel passage today celebrates that friendship, that strong bond in a relationship which enables one to go to a friend in the middle of the night with the conviction that one’s friend will “get up and give his friend all that he wants”.

Even though the friend answers from inside the house that he does not want to be bothered, and everything suggests that he has closed up shop - “the door is bolted now, and my children and I are in bed; I cannot get up and give it to you” – the very nature of the friendship allows such bold requests to be made and a response is expected.

 I recall living in the south many years ago. It was unknown territory to me and I felt like a stranger in a foreign land. Everything was new and unfamiliar and it was quite difficult making the adjustments as a young person.

I did not know the geography of the place and so it took me quite some time before I could catch my bearings. To add to my dilemma, I found myself going through a difficult personal struggle.

 I was able to make it through that time, because of the love and concern of a friend who responded to my needs and understood my plight. The middle of the night translated into spending many, many, hours on the phone at times when  they did not want to be bothered, the door was bolted and they were in their bed, yet hours were spent giving me all that I wanted – support, counsel and guidance.

We are not to be mistaken and think that we can simply make demands of our friends, or create deliberate inconveniences or use their good nature. Rather it is because of the closeness and bond in the relationship at its very core, that our friends respond for friendship’s sake.

This spirit and close relationship is demonstrated today as well in the first reading from the book of Genesis. Abraham has a strong bond with the Lord and acknowledges up front that he is “dust and ashes”.

He keeps making these requests of the Lord for the sake of Sodom and Gomorrah that they are saved from destruction, yet he is fully aware that he is bold and continually states “I trust my Lord will not be angry if I speak once more.”

Abraham is confident before his Lord and deep down has that assurance that his request will be granted. While his requests are demanding, at the same time it reflects the depth of his relationship with his God.

Similarly, in response to his disciples who asked Jesus to teach them how to pray, this passage indicates clearly that we can go to God as we go to a friend – one whom we can approach without any reservations, “in the middle of the night”.

Let us pray:
Lord, we thank you for our close friendships and relationships which help us to understand you. Lord, it is so freeing to know that we can come to you at any hour, even in the middle of the night. You are there for us Lord, and we trust and know that you will give us all that we want.

Lord, forgive us for the times when we take you and our friends, our close relationships for granted. We are demanding Lord, and we approach others without respect, as though it is our right to get what we want.

Our relationships Lord are not built on friendship, but on prestige and status, and so our approach is one whereby we take and get what we want, using and disregarding others for our own ends.

Lord, we ask you to teach us how to build close relationships and friendships, particularly with our children and our young people, so that we too can be like you for others.

Help us Lord, to respond for friendship’s sake, even when we do not want to be bothered, and  our door is bolted – “in the middle of the night”.
Amen.

Annie Gomes-Phillips is a wife and mother of two. The vice principal of Fatima College, she is a parishioner of St Theresa's, Woodbrook.