Mary Pitman

“How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breath and height my soul can reach.

Malcolm and Janet Joseph surely give meaning to those words. This happy couple celebrated their golden anniversary on Saturday, October 27, certainly compliment each other very well.

I learned the secret of their healthy, youthful look the day I spoke with them at the Catholic News office. It’s the walk they take together every day at 4 a.m. and the swim at Macqueripe beach every Saturday morning!

Malcolm said otherwise, though. He believes it’s their contentment and conservative eating habits.

They became man and wife at the Church of the Holy Rosary on October 27, 1957. Janet, formerly Collins, was born on July 5, 1937 in Port of Spain.

Her earliest years were spent in the oilfields as her father was an employee of Texaco. At the age of seven her father died and she moved to Belmont where she settled until her marriage.

Janet remembers going to Mass regularly at Rosary. “I saw this nice looking acolyte,” she said with a teasing smile. “The brother was looking nice”. Yes, she set her eyes on him.

Malcolm, who was also born in Port of Spain, grew up in an extremely spiritual environment.  He attributes his deep spirituality to his parents. He attended St Mary’s College, and was member of the CYO (Catholic Youth Organisation) where he met Janet.

“A lot of people expected me to join the religious life”, he explained. “I was also considering it.” He even had an interview with Count Finbar Ryan, the then Archbishop.

Malcolm, with a big satisfied smile as he looked at Janet, expressed, “I have no regrets getting married though”.

He reminisced on their courting days and the letter he had to write to ask permission to visit her. They were glad for the CYO functions after which he had the opportunity to escort her home.

Malcolm and Janet renew their vows

Sticking the 50th anniversary cake

He proposed. She accepted. Their preparation for marriage was like a retreat. Even their engagement was “sacramental” as they exchanged vows. Janet remembers saying, “I, Janet Collins, intend to take Malcolm Joseph as my husband.” There were even witnesses.

After two years of marriage preparation their big day finally came. Fr Mc Carthy officiated at the Nuptial Mass as Fr Keating, their parish priest and friend was away at the time. Nevertheless he was able to organise a Papal Blessing for them – one of the highlights of their wedding.

Janet who was a member of the Children of Mary under the Carmelite Sisters received a gold pendant from the nuns on the morning of her wedding. She wears it to this day. They reminisced on their beautiful and memorable wedding day.

Malcolm still remembers when they walked out the church, a man “observing” the wedding party looked at them both and shouted, “Look at them two little children, like they going and play dolly house or what?” Malcolm was 24 and Janet 19.

They spent their honeymoon in Mayaro. There was no electricity in the village and they distinctly remember a lady with a lamp coming out to greet them, asking if they were the newlyweds Mr and Mrs Joseph, as she escorted them to their rooms. 

Their marriage has been blessed with three wonderful children. Ronald, the eldest lives in Ottawa. Their elder daughter Marguerite Mantha resides in Canada and Carolyn Charles in Trinidad. They are also the proud grandparents of two.

Malcolm said were it not for Janet’s extremely supportive attitude towards him in all his decisions, he wouldn’t be where he is today. He especially remembers when he decided to retire from his job at the telephone company (Telco). “My work was stressful and I just could not take any more. I had to get out.”

When he told Janet she was as cool as a cucumber. He was positive that if it was another woman she would be worried and ask him how he was going to mind her. But Janet was her usual supportive and understanding self. Janet’s response: “That’s what unconditional love is all about”.

Janet believes marriage is a vocation. “If you want to be a nurse you will do all the courses until you are fully qualified. It should be the same with marriage. You adjust from baby to toddler to teenager,” she explained opening her hands as she said “adjust your lifestyle to suit.”

Malcolm and Janet said they accepted the responsibility of married life and they handled the ups and downs. They maintained their spirituality and knew everything would be alright once they left everything in God’s care.

Malcolm has had a long involvement in the Church, serving as a lay minister for several years, a member of the National Council of the Laity and the Social Action Justice and Peace committee in the 80s. He also served as Parish Administrator of St John’s, Diego Martin, a position he held for five years.

Malcolm is presently very involved with Caritas, working on a project to build a home to care for HIV patients.

Janet is enjoying her retirement, supporting Malcolm in all his ventures. She serves as a Eucharistic Minister and her inputs into various parish activities are always well appreciated. Her involvement with ALTA since her retirement has been integral to her deepening spirituality.

Their big celebration began with Mass at Holy Name Chapel. They had originally hoped to return to Rosary but because of construction work, Fr Harvey suggested the chapel and Sr Bernadette was quite happy to oblige.

Janet said she started planning this celebration since her last visit to Canada. She welcomed ideas but she knew what she wanted. “I am the planner and Malcolm is the supporter of finance,” she explained. She chose all the hymns, the same hymns sung on their wedding day. While Janet was planning a celebration, their children were planning a cruise. They got both.

Malcolm expressed his astonishment and appreciation of the number of priests who attended. Frs Gregory Augustine, Leo Donavan, Michael Makhan, Michael Cockburn, Michel de Verteuil, Abbot John Pereira, and of course Fr Harvey who was the chief celebrant. Religious Sisters were also present. It was an extremely touching moment for them.

The choir, led by Tara Matura, sang love songs for at least 15 to 20 minutes before the Mass.
At the reception their guests included friends who had attended their wedding 50 years ago. Our own Felix Edinborough was the MC. Malcolm laughed as he commented, “Felix did an excellent job”.

Janet said the day started off nice and sunny, followed by showers of blessings. “A perfect day”, she said as she smiled contentedly.

Malcolm and Janet thank God for this milestone, all who supported them throughout the years and all who showed them appreciation as a result of their counsel. They have helped to cement several relationships since their involvement in Marriage Encounter. They always feel good when they meet or receive a call from one of those couples.

Malcolm believes that commitment and compromise are still the two main keys to a healthy marriage. “Keep focussed on that and you are halfway through”, he swore.

Janet believes it is still very important for families to share at least one meal together. “There are too many distractions like the television...” she said. “Ensure that the family can sit and talk over a meal.”

As we read their story, Malcolm and Janet are on a cruise enjoying another honeymoon. Congratulations Malcolm and Janet. God’s abundant and continuous blessings to you and your family!

The golden Josephs celebrate

By Felix Edinborough

“You belong to my heart, now and forever.” These were the words in melodious song that heralded the entrance of Janet and Malcolm Joseph to the Holy Name Convent chapel on the morning of Saturday, October 27.

It was the start of the celebration of a golden milestone, the 50th wedding anniversary of this couple who give such faithful service to the Church of the Nativity, Crystal Stream.

This was not the entrance procession to the Mass, which followed a few minutes later. They were just entering to greet their friends and the choir thought it appropriate to remind them of a melody that they must have danced to many times in their teens.

The Mass was concelebrated by several priests with Fr Clyde Harvey as the chief celebrant. He commented that the readings of the day, especially the letter of St Paul to the Romans, was appropriate to the couple who throughout their life have no doubt been guided by the teaching that the unspiritual are interested only in what is unspiritual, but the spiritual are interested in spiritual things. Those of us who have known this spiritual couple for years can attest to the truth of this statement in their lives.

After Mass the guests, accepting the invitation to lunch, journeyed to Penny Pinchers in Diego Martin for the continuation of the celebration.

Here speeches of various degrees of seriousness and humour were delivered by daughter Marguerite who had travelled from Canada for the occasion, and two very good friends, Oswald Nicholas and Trevor Alleyne.

Needless to say the ultimate speech was delivered by Malcolm himself (with Janet’s permission). He thanked their many friends for supporting them throughout their marriage and all who have in any way been instrumental in helping them reach this unforgettable milestone.

On November 6, one day after voting for the candidate of their choice, they embarked on their gift of a Caribbean cruise for a renewed honeymoon. We wish them continued blessings and earthly bliss, a foretaste of heaven, as they voyage together.