What does the Church teach?

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states that ".men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies.do not choose their homosexual condition; for most of them it is a trial."

We are further told that they ".must be accepted with respect, compassion and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided" (2358).

However, we are called to love others by bringing them to an understanding of the truth. This is why the Church also states, "Tradition has always declared that 'homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered' " (2357).

It does not mean that because "they do not choose their homosexual condition" that homosexuals are "born that way", as many people now believe.

Homosexuality is not inherited

The American Psychological Association states, ".sexual orientation is shaped .at an early age through complex interactions of biological, psychological and social factors" for example a male child who is born with a lack of affirmation of his own masculinity from his father, male relatives and peers during his childhood.

This may develop into feelings of inferiority, fear, hatred, envy and admiration toward men with the conflicting wish to be accepted and loved by them.

Homosexuality is not normal or healthy

Homosexuality therefore, is not a normal sexual variation. In males, for example, it is characterised, in most cases, by a poor father-son relationship, difficulty in separating emotionally from one's mother, feelings of inferiority, higher than normal rates of depression, anxiety, suicide, alcohol and drug abuse, promiscuity and life- threatening diseases along with the inability to maintain monogamous relationships.

There is hope: a loving response

According to the US National Association for Research and Therapy of Homosexuality, parents can take steps to prevent homosexuality in their children.

For example, they should encourage identification with same-sex partners and peers consistently instilling (in boys) appreciation and confidence in the good qualities of maleness, at the service of others, while gently discouraging effeminate behaviour.

Healthy father-son bonding conveys the masculine qualities of confidence and independence, assertiveness and a sense of personal power (at the service of others).

They should also discourage emotional over dependence in the relationship between mother and son and not encourage them in the role of best friend, nor let them feel preferred to her husband. Encouraging and confirming those who have already developed homosexual tendencies in a "gay" or "alternative" life-style that causes so much pain and destruction of mind, body and spirit can in no way be considered a loving response.

Instead we should offer hope through Church programmes like the Courage ministry and the many websites offering support to those already struggling with this most difficult problem.

To those who feel that they have tried everything remember with God all things are possible.

Need more information or have comments? Please feel free to contact us at Emmanuel Community - 628-1064, 628-1586.